Name: Eoco Country: The land of crumpets, where tea precipitation and monocle hail are quite common. Some say that (from above) this magical place has the appearance of an asparagus-colored patchwork quilt. Others do not. What do you do on the site? When not hastily answering emails, or alienating the Sarcastic Gamer readership with sesquipedalian posts, Eoco edits all articles that go on the site (along with his co-editor, Yamster) and writes about himself in the third person at every opportunity. He has a bothersome habit of starting new 'regular' columns that are in nowayregular, and wrote the Sarcastic Gamer 'About' page. Oh, and he adores parentheses (seriously, he loves them!) Consoles Owned: Xbox 360, Playstation 3, Wii, Playstation 2, Nintendo DS, Playstation Portable, iPhone Introduce yourself, go! Wow, this question certainly puts me under a lot of pressure! Why did it feel the need to employ such discourteous interrogating techniques like a monosyllabic 'go' and stern exclamation mark? Personified punctuation aside, I am a video game and gadget nerd who spends his time regretting the vast amount of internet browsing he did the previous day. I still remember cheat codes to games I haven't owned for years, and am currently engaged in an achievement war that can only be described as unhealthy. I also look like an elf. What do you do in your freetime? When not doing the things mentioned above, you will most likely find me in the corner of a room at a 'social event' craning my neck for a power outlet, at which I can continue the things mentioned above. Hook slide? Yes. Very yes.
Approximately 2.470524 × 1016 nanoseconds ago (at the time of writing), the first Previously on Sarcastic Gamer debuted; it’s haphazard formatting and laconic writing style ensured mass lambaste from … well, the entire Sarcastic Gamer reader ship (which, by the way, boasts a very tall mast and a barnacle-covered hull.) A lot has changed since [...]
You know how on television they always have that situation where a group of people come up with a plan that happens to hinge on a particularly undesirable task? None of the group want to carry out the task, and so they sit around a table to decide who should do it. After about five [...]
If there’s one thing we learned at our compulsory two hour writing course entitled “You Can Be Funny Too: On Your Way to Making Readers Laugh”, it’s that the hottest articles don’t always have to feature the hottest scoops. It’s a bit like trying to prepare warm ice cream: you don’t have to heat up [...]
Video posts are a bit like erasers. They’re quite easy to make, are usually short and you’ve probably seen them a bajillion times before. However, being expert video game journalists we feel the need to provide our readers with a little visual media once in a while, even if it is a bit like an [...]
We’ve got three copies of Trials HD to give away! To be in with a chance of winning, simply email eoco [AT] sarcasticgamer [DAWT] com with a picture you have taken of a pile of VHS tapes. Sure, it’s a slightly unusual request, but that just makes it more fun, right? Be sure to get [...]
Despite a highly confusing contest title, the Sarcastic Gamer ‘Big You-Don’t-Get-the-BIG-Pack Giveaway’ is going ahead! Naysayers should be pleased that we didn’t use the other title we had packed into our bulbous craniums, just ready to burst out and befuddle you all: ‘The Big (But Not BIG) You-Don’t-Get-The-BIG-Pack-But-Still-Get-Quite-A-Huge-Prize-Which-Is-Not-The-BIG-Pack-But-Is-Actually-The-Full-Retail-Release-Which-You-Have-To-Admit-Is-Quite-Big-In-And-Of-Itself-Anyway-You-Can-Thank-Us-Later Big Giveaway’.
It’s that time of year again. A time full of tradition: bright lights, neatly wrapped presents and video game holiday gift guides.
Every year, video game gift guides are spread, like peanut butter, all over the cuboidal slab of bread we call the internet. We here at Sarcastic Gamer noticed this tradition, and so walked down [...]
From time to time we professional video game journalists detect certain … patterns in the hot video game scoops we type up on a daily basis. For example, game announcements. How many game announcement posts have you read that don’t cite an online job listing, a CV of a particularly non-discreet developer, an age rating [...]
Not really! We just used that overly controversial headline, that doesn’t really relate to this article in any meaningful sense (despite the veritable surplus of reputation-ruining exclamation points!), to … well, in all honesty, it was mainly just so we could use that exclamation point gag. Which wasn’t really a gag now we think about [...]
Whilst trudging one of the Eurogamer Expo’s many well-carpeted corridors (seriously, these carpets are plush!), we passed a screen showing Avatar: The Game in three dee! Fascinated by the large, JVC, coruscating display we decided to wander over in hope of having our minds utterly blown. As we carried out the aforementioned wandering, we heard [...]
Name: Eoco