The gaming world is reeling from the violent loss of one of its most beloved leaders today. Reports are streaming in to our newsroom that former Microsoft exec Peter Moore has been eaten by a grizzly bear named “tickles” at a northern California zoo.
“One minute he was there, and the next minute he was just…. gone,” said zookeeper ZoAnne Fulton.
It was not immediately clear what had happened to Moore, who recently left Microsoft to head up EA Sports.
“We looked around for a while before someone noticed that the bear seemed to be in some distress. It was like he was overheating or something,” said Fulton. “That’s when we saw his chest….. and we just knew.”
CLICK HERE FOR THE GRUESOME PHOTO!
Fortunately, Mother Nature had recently extended the warranty on Bears, and will repair or replace “Tickles” at no charge to the zoo… just as soon as she can find a box big enough…. to ship a bear.
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lol bear died with red ring of DEATH
Here’s a followup on the defective bears case:
Apparently, Mother Nature has taken the stance that since bears eat raw meat and are subject to diseases caused by such consumption, and since the cubs of said bear will probably die without their mother, it is therefore Mr. Moore’s fault that the cubs died and Mother Nature is not responsible for the replacement of said cubs.
The bear, however, was still under warranty. Given the size of the bear, a replacement will be sent in several boxes and assembly will be required upon receipt.