Resistance 2 Patch goes live Monday

January 23rd, 2009 at 3:00 pm · 5 Comments

resistance2_logoResistance 2… Ah how you scorned me with your pitiful ways, I mean linear ways.  The crappy AI, the inconsistent graphics and textures, the hackneyed story presentation.

But that’s all going to change after the 1.4 patch is released on Monday.  Full details, after the jump!

Here’s a list of exploits and other major issues that will be fixed with the patch:

* Enemy A.I. will not “immediately” run toward you when you come within 100 yards of their presence.

* In full pitched battles, only 80% of enemy A.I. will immediately target you, while the other 20% will sit still until they are destroyed.

* The magnum will now be the only gun offered in the game.

* Altered invisible enemies to allow 1.5 seconds to react before dying, up from .9 seconds.

* Made obvious, linear paths less obvious and more linear.

* Instead of getting shot in the head at the end, Hale merely becomes sunburned.

* Adding 97 new quick time events to spice up the game!

Well there you go.  A patch that’s guaranteed to make Resistance 2 not suck anymore… well, wait a minute, you mean Hale dies at the end?  WTF!!!

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    Categories: News · Parody News

    5 responses so far ↓

    • JuicedPirate says:

      God, this game just does not want to be played. I have put 2 hours in to it on launch and now it sits. I was hoping this was a real patch.

      I did not want to know the ending though

    • Farko says:

      i had alot more fun with the first one, mainly because i could carry all of my weapons so i could play how I wanted (plus they were alot better with a few exceptions)

      plus the story was alot better, with better supporting characters

    • Lono says:

      @Farko: Agreed.

    • balaamsafe says:

      TAG THE SPOILERS
      You probably just ruined the plot for someone

    • Deirdre says:

      Yeah, he ruined it for me, but given that I’ve had the game since nearly launch and haven’t had the heart to drag myself through the painfully linear and handholdy single player campaign levels, I can’t say I’m particularly bothered.

      Don’t get me wrong, the package as a whole isn’t bad at all, but I think the single player campaign misses the mark. It feels as through they somehow managed to not learn from the past five years of progress in story based FPS’.

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