A short while after Nintendo’s excellent press conference I tried to contact drummer extraordinaire Ravi Drums, with the aim of getting an interview. Unfortunately I’ve had no reply as of yet, so I thought I’d post the questions I had lined up for him anyway. It just seemed such a shame to waste them.

Hard hitting questions involving walruses, boats and drum kits after the break.

1. Hello Ravi. First, let me start by saying that I really enjoyed seeing you show off Wii Music in your excellent performance at E3. How did it feel to be up on stage drumming in front of all those big scary journalists that might make fun of you at the slightest slip up?

2. If a copy of Wii Music was being played in the woods, but there was no-one there to hear it, does it still suck as much as it did at E3?

3. Wii Music has received very good write ups at big video game outlets such as CNN. How did it feel to really drum the message about Wii Music into people’s minds at E3?

4. Are you really called Ravi Drums?

5. You obviously love drumming and Wii music, but what would you do if you were on a cruise in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, when you are suddenly hit by a stray walrus that crushes your boat leaving you in the sea with only a set of drums and a copy of Wii Music near you. You need one arm to swim and your mouth has been sealed up by rapid salt crystallization, so you can only save one thing: Wii Music or your Drum kit?

6. Do you think Wii Music would choose to save you over the drum kit if it was in the same position?

7. If a copy of Wii Music was inside the walrus that crushed your boat in question 2, would you try and rescue it from its gold pedestal by entering inside the walrus, climbing down it’s slimy trachea and entering the deep bowel or would you consider that too dangerous? FYI, this is a genetically engineered space walrus that is as big as a blue whale, so you’ll be able to climb inside easily.

8. If the walrus from the previous question was playing Wii Music, but had suffered significant internal body damage from you going inside it, would you kick it off so that you could have a go or would you go wait your turn?

9. If Wii Music was playing a walrus, would you kick it off so that you could have a go or would you go wait your turn?

10. If a walrus had no flippers due to injury from hitting a boat, would you rather take it to the doctor or play Wii Music?

11. If you were a no flippered space walrus that had hit a cruise ship and then been climbed inside of by a world class percussionist, would you kick yourself off Wii Music in order to climb inside of a drum kit?

12. If you were a drum kit that had grown walrus fins, would you save a copy of Wii Music that was inside yourself?

So, what did you think? What improvements could I have made? At what point would Ravi have left the interview? Post your thoughts in the comment box below.

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