After two long weeks of street war and bloodshed, plus hundreds dead and thousands more with severe injuries, the executives at SarcasticGamer.com are finally taking responsibility. A recall has been issued for every Sarcastic Gamer t-shirt distributed.
“People just didn’t realize how cool these shirts were until after they started showing up on the backs of loyal SG fans,” explained Jeromy ‘Doc’ Adams. “Once they appeared in public, it was all-out barbarian maulings to obtain a shirt in any possible way. Walking into Gamestop was like fighting for a loose basketball against a bunch of coked-out Globetrotters.”
Although approximately 200 t-shirts were sold, the official number of deceased geeks passed the 700 mark late yesterday. Nicholai Kozlov, age 17, walked into a Moscow bowling alley sporting the ’sarcasm > truth’ apparel. After his shirt-inspired confidence allowed him to bowl strikes in his first five frames, he was tackled by a random bowler wearing fake purple ‘Night Elf’ ears. Kozlov was then fatally stabbed eight times with a butter knife, later described by the attacker as ‘the Shortsword of Vengeance’.
However, in relation to the seemingly impossible 700 death toll, the night elf was soon sent to the graveyard by an enthusiastic SG fan, armed with a jousting pole on a moped.
And then that guy ran into a tree.
Unfortunately, Sarcastic Gamer will not offer cash refunds for any merchandise sold. Customers have a choice between a personalized ‘I’m Sorry’ letter from Dave, or a replacement t-shirt that is guaranteed to cause a 100% drop in savage muggings.
(thanks for the picture unohisname)
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xibxang, you are one ugly mother f##ker…
lol…
Look!! It’s a BigAndiD sighting!!!
and, OMG, a female fan of Sarcasticgamer??? Who knew? Dave will be so pleased.
another low blow to GTR! XD I love it!
And so tasteful as well.
LOL… If that`s the new T-Shrits I shall order one,because Sweden is you neighbor country ( I live in Norway)..
I’ll take that note…
Volkov… the force is _strong_ with this one!
Nice job man!
I nearly sprayed whisky and coke all over my screen. Brilliant post. I really AM ugly!
\o/
javla rovhal
ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz…..
Ni ar bara svartsjuka for att vi kan gora skottljud i olika sprak.
(you are just jealouse because we can make bulletsound in several languages)
Clever stuff
@ 9
That’s not what the online translator says –
“Yous am failing only jealousy in order to wes able gora Scotland in various crackle.”
@ Jakub
LMFAO!
Contrary to original reports, the shirt does NOT prevent the wearer from having sex, I got laid in mine yesterday afternoon.
@JakubK666
well you can either trust a faulty online translator with terrible swedish grammar and bad wording or you can listen to someone that has lived in sweden fo 23 years
have u all seen the latest “artwork” im sure the games called scrabble not scramble lol
wow
both of those items are pretty worthless but i would take the letter
@ Shadders
Erm…. Very Good?
Death toll Correction, now 701
Then i can understand their trashtalk because i live in sweden.
Pretty good!
it sounds like the fight from anchor man, but with more sarcasm,
who that guy with the xbox he looks really handsome.I am not gay or anything but I can’t help it
Uno, you’re not gay for calling yourself handsome… ROFL!!!!
hahahahaha
Nice GTR shirt. :p
Jeromy Adams?!?!?! Are u F****** serious? Wow, doc is soooo much cooler
Epic. XD
The pictures of the shirt could have used more Makelevi in them, but no other complains from there lol
I found sarcasticgamer.com very informative. The article is professionally written and I feel like the author knows the subject very well. sarcasticgamer.com keep it that way.