Hello. It’s 6AM, and I haven’t gone to bed yet. But shhh…keep this on the down-low. Lono would castrate me quicker than a penis-hating lumberjack, if he saw an article on the front page that he didn’t get to chop to pieces first.
Here are three things I’m pondering which are keeping me awake:
The 1UP Podcast. Since I don’t sleep well in total silence (sound vibrations ward off vampires), I always like to put on something really boring right before I drift off. Since I just completed the abridged version of Gabe Newell’s new book, “101 Ways to Design Games and Eat Simultaneously”, I decided to have my first listen to the famous 1UP Yours show.
It was so dull, it actually put me in a more awake state, and forced me to intensely think about how mundane it was. TWO HOURS of three or four people agreeing with each other or backing off from a disagreement. From my 120 minutes of total time to judge, these lackeys are too afraid to make the battle royal entertainment and blood lust we all crave.
Gatorade? I’m moderately sure electrolytes don’t cause insomnia, but no one can really be sure. I drank one of these purple sports drinks, but I have no further desire to play sports, nor is my sweat purple. What a rip.
GamerTag Radio’s ultimate demise. I won’t be playing in the match tonight, unless you pussies want to try really playing Call of Duty 4. You know, on the superior PC system with zero-point accuracy mouse controls, and console-edging graphics. Either way, I can’t stop thinking about how humiliating it is going to be for GTR to have to go through all that work, just to plaster our name on their site. It’s going to be sweet, sweet victory.
Night. I’ll probably be passed out in my own salty drool when you read this.
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6 responses so far ↓
1 Jared // Apr 25, 2008 at 8:17 am
“I’ll probably be passed out in my own salty drool when you read this”
Gotta love these images…
2 djdsf // Apr 25, 2008 at 8:20 am
I have the same deal.
Damn you Gatorade!!
3 Charlie // Apr 25, 2008 at 8:54 am
ouch… stop with the gabe hating.
4 Sean "Rothbart" Workman // Apr 25, 2008 at 10:26 am
You have to admit that the first 13 minutes of the 4/18 1UP Yours podcast about San Andreas mods on the PC version of GTA:SA was friggin’ hilarious… you must’ve been listening to an older (or newer) edition of the podcast. Generally, I would agree with you though.
Everyone needs to listen to those 13 minutes.
5 Mr Nood1e // Apr 25, 2008 at 3:16 pm
Yeah, 1up yours is ok. They do try to avoid arguing alot, which can make it dull at times. But listening to Shawn Elliot tell his griefing stories on 1up yours and GFW is well worth listening to.
6 CamDog // Apr 26, 2008 at 5:59 pm
I agree with Rothbart those first 13 min. of the 1up show (this week) are great…. its crazy how some people play games.
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