In an unprecedented move, competitors from virtually every fighting game ever made have come together to establish the Sanctioned Tournament Fighters Union. The primary focus of the Union is to keep all video game fighters gainfully employed. The Union will attempt to stifle the ever increasing trend of some of the more prominent fighters from making “special guest appearances” in specialty games in exchange for outrageous salaries and sign on bonuses.

One major change is that all fighting games will now have an equal opportunity to choose participants from a same pool of equally paid fighters. Gone are the worries of corporate sponsorship, or franchise loyalty. The driving force here is to stop fighting games from trying to stand out simply based on which, or how many fighters are associated with a game. More importantly though, this means gamers could very soon see a Mortal Kombat game featuring Mario using his Buttslam Fatality on Sonic, or Ryu’s flaming fireballs hitting Princess Peach in the face.

The second major change is the alignment of all fighters will now effectively be neutral. Fighters will be paid the same scale wages and will be openly available to all games. While some fighters have expressed concern over teams and tight-knit groups being broken up, others are much more open to the idea of mixing things up.

Sarcastic Gamer was able to break through the bureaucratic red tape and get some comments to these monumental change directly from those affected.

Link: “This really sucks. I only get my own feature game every few years. Getting paid the nice salary and sign-on bonuses to be in the Smash Bros. games really helped make ends meet. Now, I’ll be getting paid the same piddly amount as that pompous ass Mario and the rest of the other meatheads in that game. I probably won’t waste my time.”

Solid Snake: “I’m really excited at the prospects of being the first male figher in a Rumble Roses game, I really hope that works out… I’m not getting any younger. Those girls sure are young though… Heh heh, they don’t call me Solid Snake for nothing! I’ve been trying for years to seal the deal with Link… you know, someone told me once that Link was a guy. Ha ha! Can you believe that?”

King: “Roar… rowr, roar, meow hiss. ROOOOOAAAAARRRRR!”

Master Chen: “More tournaments means more chances to prove to the world that I am the true Drunken Master, not that no-talent Jackie Chan…”

Chun Li: “It sounds great to me. I didn’t make much more than the average wage anyway. Ryu and Ken made so much more than I did, but I was just as important to the team. I hate to use the expression, being a woman and all, but if I have to “whore” myself out to as many tournaments as possible to earn a decent living, it’s nice knowing I have the support of my union and won’t have to resort to any goofy masks or disguises when taking on additional jobs. When I start thinking what I’m doing is wrong, I just think to myself ‘STFU’ and it’s all better.”

As Sarcastic Gamer learns more about this story, you can count on us to share it!

Tweet This Post