Thanks to the huge amount of negative press that violent and mature video games have been getting over the past two years, the gaming industry has finally stepped up and said “enough is enough!” With their own multi-billion dollar backed lobbyists and the support of many government officials (who benefit greatly from campaign contributions and the income provided by the industry to their respective cities/states) the North American gaming industry (specifically EA and Activision) are pushing for the abolishment of the ESRB in favor of a much more easy to understand and effective system.
Find out why this new system is so much better, after the jump!
In a joint press conference today in Seattle, Washington, the heads of both EA and Activision Blizzard (their first amicable appearance together to date) announced their new warning system for parents.
John R. of EA- “We (Michael G. and myself) are proud to announce the “SLAP” system, and no, SLAP is not an acronym for anything, we literally want to give game retailers the ability to “SLAP” ignorant consumers. We have tried very hard to be patient and understanding, thinking that ‘most parents’ could not possibly be so dumb as to blindly give away hundreds of dollars to young children or purchase violent titles without even bothering to read the blatantly obvious warnings on the cover. Even our patience has limits though.”
Michael G. of Activision Blizzard- “What we propose is this: if any parent approaches a game retailer with a child who cannot be proven to be of the appropriate age for whatever title they wish to purchase, the retailer will now be legally obligated to SLAP said parent. And by slap I mean a full on “b***h, where is my money” backhand. Should an actual child attempt to buy a title above their age category, we will “SLAP” their hopes and dreams by telling them that “Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny are not real” and that “they were an accident their parents never wanted.”
Since pain aversion treatments have been proven to be effective in changing the negative behavior of field mice, it seemed at least plausible that a similar effect could be obtained among the middle class parent population of North America.
The “SLAP” system is in the final stages of implementation but should start to see use before the beginning of the new year. Time will tell if this new system will be able to get through the thick skulls of millions of ignorant consumers.
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
he he he if only it were true ^^;
LOL! I worked at a best buy over the 06 Christmas season… I wanted to slap so many ignorant parents.
Exmple: A pent with a child that is approximately 7 -9 years old
me: “You know that GTA: San Andreas is rated M for Mature? just making sure you’re aware”
Soccer mom: “Oh yeah, I trust my kid though”
Me: *Man I wanna slap this idiot*
I work in foodservice, and although not similar at all, I still deal with the stupidity of the American middle class.
It hurts my soul.
This made my day.
oh man does this apply to Jack Thompson too?
If only…
I agree about ignorance, people need to get on the stick, but I am 16, not technically legal to purchase these games, but I play Halo and Cod4 all the time, I am not saying that kids should have GoW in their collections, but I for one do not need any help with games, My parents DO trust me, and I make it worth their time, by not letting garbage slip in.
Sven I work at bestbuy as well and what i find most annoying is when you warn a parent about content and then a day or so later they come back to the store bitching about how you sold harmful material to them and their kid.
(each time it happens I die a little inside)
i think the esrb rating is easy enough to figure out. can it get get any easier than ” blood and gore, intense violence, strong langauge, strong sexual content, use of drugs? if you cant read the box and figure out that gta san andreas is bad for your 10 yo, they should sterilize you on scene
As a teen I understand the sex drugs and what not but violence you can be a touch lenient on as long as your not acting as a psychotic serial killer or criminal but as like a soldier.
meh
people are dumb dumb dumb.
as much fun as this system would be for us retail employees, parents will find ways to be stupid no matter what.
SLAP… Roe sham beau!!!