Mass Effect’s DLC announcement earlier this week was huge. Adding over an hour to the game for only $5. Sounds like a sweet deal to me, but the good news doesn’t stop there. More DLC has been announced to further enhance the game play experience. The price has not been set yet, but it’ll be worth it.
Trust me.
Ever since Fox New’s coverage of the sex in Mass Effect, the phones have been ringing off the hook at Bioware. Thousands of gamers have been calling in around the clock asking why they haven’t seen the Luke Skywalker meets Debbie does Dallas sex scenes.
Bioware decided that if the customers wants sex, they’re going to get it. Company spokesperson, Mike Coffin, made the jaw dropping announcement earlier today.
“Mass Effect’s second piece of downloadable content will be a full on sex scene with adult superstar Tera Patrick. She’s hot and willing to bare and do it all to help us help our customers, who will then help themselves.”
That’s right, the voluptuous Tera Patrick will be in Mass Effect. It will be a scene from one of her many movies. The only way to unlock the sex scene after you download it is to beat the game, completing every quest there is, including the DLC that is coming out in March.
After you unlock the hardcore achievement, you can watch it as many times as you want. This brings a whole new meaning to the term replayability.
Look for XBL to go down at the beginning of April, when this is released. It’ll break my heart to see it go down again, but sacrifices must me made.
I bet all of the guys that traded the game in are really kicking themselves now. That reminds me, I need to get my copy back from Doc.
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lol, dave, you are a dirty dirty boy. down right hilarious though
Hahaha the name made my heart leap, but as soon as I started reading the actual article, I remembered that it was Friday.
Damn you and your mind games.
=D
Tera Patrick FTW! Quick someone send this to Cooper Lawerence and FOX News and lets see what happen. Sarcastic Gamer could be on FOX for an interview because we all know how much FOX researches into the news they provide.
I am going to have to get me a 360 and Mass Erect, sorry Mass Effect from one of my friends when this comes out…
Tera Patick is sweet . She has a juicy pussy and tasty tits. I need to have sex with her… I am ready. (Dr. Azzam Tamimi, Director of the Institute of Islamic political Thought, London/UK (info@ii-pt.com)
Islam’s message is to destroy all states and governments anywhere on the face of the Earth which are opposed to the ideology and programme of Islam regardless of the country or the nation which rules it. The purpose of Islam is to set up a state on the basis of its own ideology and programme, regardless of which nation assumes the role of the standard bearer of Islam or the rule of which nation is undermined in the process of the establishment of an ideological Islamic state. It must be evident that the objective of Islamic ‘Jihad’ (armed struggle) is to eliminate the rule of an un-Islamic system and establish in its stead an Islamic system of state rule. Islam does not intend to confine this revolution to a single state or a few countries; the aim of Islam is to bring about a universal revolution.”
Furthermore, anybody in the world, with faith or without faith, must come together in order to eradicate this cancer from the body of humanity, Israel. We are ever grateful to the late Imam Khomeini for starting this occasion, namely the Jerusalem Day because the world . . . must never forget Jerusalem, must never forget Jerusalem. For us Muslims, Jerusalem is the mother of faith. Jerusalem is in our hearts and minds. Jerusalem is the cornerstone to our Islamic nation. Those who are prepared to sell Jerusalem do not represent us, do not speak for us. Those who resist, those who fight, those who perform jihad(martyrdom) against Zionism are the true representatives of the Palestinians, and all the Muslims regarding the Palestinian issue.
Do you know why Tony Blair, George Bush, and all the members of this camp are so worried? They are worried because they know the world can see clearly today that Israel is a menace, is a threat to humanity. They can no longer fool anybody and they are worried that this spoiled baby of theirs is about to be thrown out of this human body of ours. Allah –u-Akbar.
It is just a matter of time. You count my words and you remember these words. It is a matter of time, as they were removed from south Lebanon because of the great jihad of Hezbollah; and as they are removed from Gaza because of the great jihad of Hamas and Islamic jihad this black chapter in the history of humanity will eventually come to an end– and we say, we say we are willing to bring it to an end peacefully. But if they don’t want peace, we have another language, we have another language, and we have every right to use that language and time will tell and history will tell.
(Dr. Azzam Tamimi, Director of the Institute of Islamic Political Thought/London/United Kingdom. (info@ii-pt.com)