Jeff Gerstmann announces something, no one cares

February 29th, 2008 at 11:30 am · 16 Comments

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SOMEONE’S BASEMENT - Candy bar guru and internet famous game journalist, Jeff Gerstmann, revealed an ambitious career-revitalizing plan this morning. Sadly, nobody seems to give a damn what he thinks, or if he does have a podcast that’s topping the iTunes charts. While several journalists attended the event, none of them took notes, and not a soul could remember what the hell Gerstmann had said.

“I think he mentioned something about a podcast where they reviewed food or something, but I tuned out after the first few seconds,” said one reporter who wishes to remain anonymous. “It kind of reminds me of the reviews he did back at Gamespot. Lots of words, little meaning.”

Gerstmann sprang to fame late last year, when Gamespot got sick of his shit and fired his ass for doing lines of Fun Dip and Swiss Cake Rolls while at work, attracting thousands of piss ants. In the backlash that followed, mindless gamers began protests that, in the end, boosted Gamespot’s traffic by more than 200%.

We were able to reach Gerstmann for comment in his parents’ basement, earlier today, but for the life of me I couldn’t remember anything the man talked about. But I did leave with a better appreciation for the McRib.

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