Detroit police discovered Bobby Weir, pictured above, deceased in his bed early this morning. He was found with an unusual circular bruise located on the right side of his face, leading crime scene investigators to believe he passed from blunt trauma to the head.
“We believe this is an open-shut case of angry girlfriend.” said detectives. “Girl shares feelings of neglect because of video games, guy laughs hysterically and finishes beer, and Xbox360 flies savagely across room. It’s a classic story.”
The 21 year old corpse was discovered partially stuffed inside of an undersized white box addressed to Microsoft. Officials from the corporation commented that even if they accepted warranties on dead bodies, he was 18 years over the limit anyway.
Authorities are still on the lookout for the victim’s girlfriend, who was last seen on security cameras at a local Kmart, purchasing a Playstation 3 console.
A comment from a DPD spokesman states, “We need to find this woman, before she turns her next target black and Blu.”
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13 responses so far ↓
1 Matt "Volkov" Schmidt // Jan 25, 2008 at 2:35 am
I just had to add the knee slapper at the end.
2 Zimbaa // Jan 25, 2008 at 8:04 am
hahaha!
3 commander121 // Jan 25, 2008 at 8:11 am
nice thats heaps good
ps
i hate this dam thing that you need to retype every time you want to comment
4 doc // Jan 25, 2008 at 8:25 am
@commander
Just redister for the main site on the left and you wont have to worry about it anymore.
5 FaMiCuS // Jan 25, 2008 at 9:56 am
@doc
I’ve tried reseting my password twice and I still can’t log in.
6 Sean "rothbart" Workman // Jan 25, 2008 at 11:22 am
@doc: I have to type it as well and I’m most definitely logged in… although I find some of the phrases mildly entertaining.
See this: http://i102.photobucket.com/albums/m95/rothbart_photos/captcha.jpg
7 Deetex // Jan 25, 2008 at 2:18 pm
wait, the 21 year old CORPSE?!
8 NoneOfYourBusiness // Jan 25, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Logged in and I get to spell “Hostilities Bonuses”…
9 Jeffrey // Jan 25, 2008 at 2:49 pm
Lol geez I hope that’s not a real corpse
10 SilverTorch // Jan 25, 2008 at 4:36 pm
I get to type “quarter drifting”… makes me think of a quarter hitchhiking across america…. I dont know why though
11 NecrisJ1MM // Jan 25, 2008 at 5:22 pm
Who the heck is that guy? Looks like he had too many a beers.
12 Matt "Volkov" Schmidt // Jan 25, 2008 at 6:45 pm
Heh. I was having an awfully hard time trying to find a picture by searching Google for “murder”. So I just typed “sleep” instead.
13 Cube // Jan 26, 2008 at 4:10 am
this is from a sick and twisted serial killer gamer who leaves red rings rather than roses on his kills.
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