by Dave


Nintendo has announced Girls Gone Wii. It appears that Nintendo has switched gears and instead of going after Soccer Moms and Creepy Nintendo Fanboys,they’re goint to try to capture some of the casual adult male audience that is ruled by Sony and Microsoft.Girls Gone Wii is a first person shooter that guarantees hours of fun for pervs and party animals alike, with two modes of game play.

As a woman:

• Run around a club and look for guys with beads or a camera and show them your Wii pasties. This can be done by holding your Wiimote at you waist and pulling up to about your neck. Then hold the Wii and Nunchuk at chest level and shake the controlers back and forth for extra points!
• Don’t forget Dave’s number one rule, always go for the swag, no reason to leave the experience without a shirt that says “I show my breasts for next to nothing.”
• The longer you show the goods, the more beads you will get!
• If they start to lose interest do something more extreme like kiss another girl or take her back to a random hotel room and have relations with her while strangers watch and film.

As a man:

• Find girls showing their goods and hit them with beads. Use the Wiimote to aim at the girls head for extra points!
• The more showing at the time the beads hit them the more points you get.
• Use the Wiimote like a camera and be sure to focus on the chest area for extra points!

Last, but not least, if you beat both paths on hard, the original tax evader himself, Joe Francis, will come to your house and demand that you show him and his crew your jugs. After that, you will be propelled into international super-stardom as the cover person for the next Girls Gone Wild DVD. Nintendo hopes that this game will be a can’t miss for fans of public indecency and exploitation.

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