by Jeromy “Doc” Adams

Not satisfied with dominating just 2 of the 5 vowels in the English language, Electronic Arts (EA) announced today that they had reached an exclusive licensing deal with Mirriam Webster and the World Trademark Bureau for the remaining 3 letters.

“We think EA-IOU has a great ring to it, and it really reflects our market leadership,” said Todd Devine, legal spokesperson for the company. “In time, gamers will come to realize the benefits of EA-IOU’s vowel exclusivity, just as they now see why it was so important for us to own the NFL license.”

EA-IOU’s chief sports rival, 2K, countered this news with their own announcement of a competing line of vowels that no one has ever heard of, but that look fantastic.

The letter Y, could not be reached for comment, but a spokesperson for the occasional vowel confirms that he has been approached by EA to be the new slogan.

Look for “EA-I.O.U…..Y?” on splash screens everywhere, starting early next year.

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